INFERNO

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I’m beginning to think Italian horror is not for me. These “classics” made by “legends” are turning out to be way over hyped, even from a cult following standpoint. First, I was disappointed with Cannibal Holocaust. Now, I am flabbergasted by Italian “horror pioneer” Dario Argento’s Inferno.

The premise is simple enough: A creepy apartment building in NYC has an eerie way of making tenants disappear. There are so many directions a writer can go with this. That’s why it’s mind-boggling that they couldn’t come up with anything worthwhile or entertaining. The plot makes zero sense, littered with as many holes as the rats CHEWED into that old man- whoops! I just spoiled the only mildly interesting scene in the entire movie! I think Inferno would have been more engaging if it just followed those rats around from apartment to apartment as they slowly took over the building.

The main character (if you could even call him that) isn’t introduced until far into the film. It’s like he missed his cue and was trying desperately to edge his way in at an inappropriate time. The movie shifts around at a nauseating pace, an endless loop of uninteresting shenanigans. Watching actors slink about at a snail’s pace only to be unceremoniously BUTCHERED doesn’t do anything for the audience if they 1. Don’t give a damn about them or 2. Have no idea why they are being killed or what ramifications their departure brings to light.

Inferno plays out like a sub-par special effects artist’s demo reel. The disjointed filmmaking and DREADFUL acting makes for a grade Z attempt at manufacturing a “cult masterpiece”. Apparently, this film is one in a trilogy of “horrors” Argento has created. Maybe I started off with poorly chosen films to get into the scene, but if this is the best Italian horror has to offer, then I don’t think eye‘ll be coming back for more.

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1 “gratuitous” “use” “of” “quotes” out of 5

★☆☆☆☆

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