Another year, another MASSACRE MARATHON, another sequel in a classic franchise. A Nightmare On Elm Street 4: The Dream MasterĀ takes the series further into bizarre territory. Freddy is back and he is (you guessed it!) killing high-schoolers again. He is targeting the remaining teens who shut his shit down in the previous film and won’t stop until they are all dead.

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OK, so this isn’t promo material for Julia Ducournau’s 2016 French horror film Raw, but whatever this is for was probably more entertaining. The coming of age cannibal film received outstanding compliments on the festival circuit but did not live up to its praise. Don’t let that poster up there distract you from the rest of this review.

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Just in time to swoop down and hoist me out of the pit of bad movies I was falling into comes The Girl with All the Gifts. A modern zombie movie from a younger infected girl’s perspective, TGWATG brings some new things to the genre. The 2016 British film is directed by Colm McCarthy and stars Gemma Arterton (The Voices, Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters), Paddy Considine (Dead Man’s Shoes), and Glenn Close (too many to name).

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The Monster Squad is a 1987 family adventure film directed by Frank Dekker (Night of the Creeps). It showcases newer (at the time) takes on the classic Universal Monsters who are descending upon the suburbs to recover a powerful ancient tome. When a band of kids finds themselves in the monsters’ way, they must band together to protect their town from evil.

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The 1989 gross-out film Society has been popping up in my peripheral over the past couple of years. The unnerving patchwork DVD cover caught my eye so I decided to give it a go. It follows the story of a paranoid young man who is convinced by another suspicious kid that there is something fishy going on with his family. The further he investigates, the more danger he puts himself in. Are the wealthy people he had lived with his whole life actually who they say they are or is he just loosing his mind? He soon discovers there is weight to his theories.

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Pet is a psychological-horror film about a man who has been rejected one too many times. Dominic Monaghan (The Lord of the Rings, Lost) plays Seth, a guy who just wants someone to reciprocate his feelings of love. The closest thing he has to this are the dogs at the shelter he works at. He takes care of them and in return they are eager to love him back. One day while he is eating at a diner he meets a beautiful waitress, one that finds her way into his heart in a matter of seconds. However, when Seth tries to coerce her into a date he lays it on too thick and comes off creepy. She repeatedly but politely denies him. Seth takes this as an insult and the final straw, so he begins to come up with a plan to capture the waitress and subdue his loneliness permanently. He decides to use an old forgotten area of the pound to serve as his prison. Soon she will become his pet and she WILL learn to love him!

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What is the Spanish word for cash grab? You might not find it anywhere in [REC] 3: Genesis’ subtitles, but upon viewing you will learn what a cash grab smells like because this movie is as rank as spoiled tripe!

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