The Messengers takes me back to the distant time when lead Kristen Stewart (Twilight, Underwater) wasn’t world famous for being a sparkly vampire. God, saying that out loud makes me feel old.
A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night, or for the sake of this review, AGWHAAN, is an Iranian film noir focused on a slew of deadbeats in “Bad City” whose lives all become intertwined with a young vampire. The film is beautifully shot, with the black and white giving it a gloomy tone. Between the male lead’s ’50s bad boy attitude/style and the female lead’s angst-ridden record collection at some point I was waiting for The Smiths to start playing and for them to ditch the school dance to go read poems to each other in the woods. On a scale of grindhouse to arthouse AGWHAAN definitely throws its weight more on the stylistic side, lacking the substance to make first time director Ana Lily Amirpour’s effort really hit home (similar to the trap The Neon Demon fell into). Continue reading
Welcome to the first installment of a very special event I hold close to my warm heart. Well, not my heart. My actual heart is dark and gloomy, cold and covered in bug-ridden pustules. No, this one isn’t mine, I just picked this heart out of the human waste pile at the hospital I work at. That’s right! Your very own Manster got his first job working the night shift mopping blood at Creely Sanatorium! What was I talking about? Oh, the MASSACRE MARATHON!!! I got a late start tonight but I have to be fully committed (considering last year I surprised myself and completed my goal of a WHOLE MONTH of movies every night and writing accompanying reviews!) so I feel obligated to stay up all night to finish this premiere post! I must meet the now standard expectation of 31 nights of horror! SO, without further ado (and before I clog the arteries of this paragraph like many parasitic tube worms with more phrases in parentheses) let’s get on with it!